This is when my life began. Again.

I looked up from the book I had just finished reading. I had tears in my eyes. From my front porch, I could hear a bird singing nearby. I felt a breeze on my face. I looked around my yard and neighborhood and sighed. Something big was about to happen...

I absorbed what I just read.

My life made sense now. My whole life made sense all in this moment.

I smiled. And I cried.

I cried because deep down I knew that in reading Like Me, my life was going to change. My life had to change. I had been stuck in limbo for far too long. I was living a lie and I was ashamed of myself.

I cried because I was so very scared. I knew that in telling people, I may lose people that I cared about.

I cried because I wasn't exactly sure how I was going to go about telling people.

I cried because I knew that I had finally found my path to happiness.

I smiled again.

My whole life I searched for someone who was like me. I couldn't understand why I had the feelings that I did and I grew up being told that being gay wasn't "right." As I read Chely Wright's words, I found myself saying "Me too!" and I was proud of Chely for having the courage to come out to the world. All of a sudden, I wanted to come out to the world too!

Living a lie was tiring. I wanted to live life instead. I needed to tell my world.

I closed the book, stood up, and began looking at the world with whole new eyes.

It was all going to be okay. Life would be good.

Life is good.

Thank you, Chely.

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10 comments:

Trish said...

I am so happy you are happy and living your true self! This post is beautiful!

Bari said...

I'm so glad you are living the life you deserve to live. Love you, girl.

Ivey League Mama said...

I love when someone else's words can inspire me to act on something like that.

One of my favorite things I've seen lately is a piece of art by Robin Plemmons that says "be who you be".

Hoping you can "be who you be" and maybe, just maybe, the ones who you care about will surprise you.

Roo said...

This makes me smile. I'm glad that you are at the point where you can be true to YOU. Period. Love you!

WERC said...

I believe in God's perfection... I belive in God's unconditional love... I believe, you are just the way He planned... and I believe he gave you to me, so I can give myself to you. You are perfect just the way you are. I love you <3

Heather EO said...

What a beautiful post. Thank you for being you, my friend.

CJ said...

I spent too many years trying to be what they wanted me to be. Only in being who I wanted (NEEDED?) to be, did I find my true happiness. I lost my parents, but I gained an entirely new family...one who loves me and is proud of me for being who I am. Welcome to the club.

MitaKay said...

I remember this day vividly and how excited yet frightened you were. I am SO VERY proud of how you've handled this transition to your true self and all of the accomplishments you've achieved and hurdles you've cleared with grace. I told you that you would find someone who loved you for you and you've done that. I couldn't be happier for you, my friend.

Mel said...

Chely has been a guest several times on the Stephanie Miller radio show and I'm always in complete awe of her. Having lived in Nashville and worked in the music industry for several years, I know just *how* small town Nashville can be. I applaud her bravery for coming out and paving the way for other closeted entertainers in Nashville to hopefully one day do the same. More importantly, I'm so thankful her words "spoke" to you and you were able to begin living your truth and find happiness. Love you!!

Bacardi Mama said...

I am so happy for you that your life is now about truth. If you lost anyone in coming out, they weren't worth having in your life anyway. Anyone who loves you, loves the real you. Not the person you were pretending to be. I love the real April and couldn't be happier that she is living her authentic life filled with love.

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