The Value of Friendships

To the two people that this post involves: I'm so very sorry for what happened tonight. Had I known it would have ever come to this, I would have never said, "Let's f*** with her a little bit."

Now, I'll think 500 times before ever deciding to play a practical joke on someone.

See, I love jokes. I admit I can get a bit carried away with jokes sometimes. But I swear to you that I only play them when I feel that the person being punk'd can handle it. When I feel like they will be cool with it after all is said and done.

Tonight, that assumption blew up in my face.

The details more than what I have given you are not important unless the you are the two involved. (And I know you both read my blog, so I pray you are reading this.) The outcome of what happened is more important than anything right now.

I'm not sure of a lot of the details that have been going on in that friendship before the events of tonight. But after what happened tonight, I have to believe that something is going on.

It hurts me to see two people who were good friends let outside influences interrupt their friendship. I have let this happen to friendships of mine in the past, and trust me when I say that I regret letting those outside influences happen.

I've lost good friends by letting what others think get involved. Let me say that the beginning of what happened tonight is my fault. I take the blame for this. If you try to not let me take the blame, I'm just going to be mad, so let me take the blame for playing a bad joke, okay?

But, what isn't my fault is what is going on with the two of you. Obviously, as stated before, I feel like there is something going on. At this point, it's time that you stop the bullshit, sit down, and talk with one another. Only then will you learn if your friendship is at a dead end or worth creating a new beginning. Only then will you learn how much your friendship means, and how much you mean to one another.

Friendships come and go in our lives. Some friends we make for a little while. Others become family. To me, we are all lucky enough to have two families. The family God gave us. They are our blood; where we came from. Our roots. Without them, we wouldn't be here. Then we have the family that we choose. These are our friends. The ones that we can laugh with, dance with, drink with, and just be with. Often times, they understand us in ways that others may not. Or may not be able to. These people are our hearts. They our our souls.

I have friends in my life now that I know I cannot live without. The mere thought of not having these people in my life breaks my heart, so I know that if there is ever something going on between us, I will need to talk with them about it. And while I hope that it never comes to that, I know I am strong enough to say, "hey we need to talk," rather than hide behind the walls of email and text messages.

So, to the girls that this began with tonight: Please, I beg of you talk to one another. I can't tell you how sorry I will always be for being the catalyst of what happened tonight. I'll need to learn to forgive myself and sometimes that is the hardest thing to do.

To others: If you're in a similar situation, please, please, please talk this out. Even if it means that you come to the conclusion that the friendship will no longer be healthy, you have to come to that conclusion together. Sometimes closure is just as important as "fixing it". But if fixing the friendship is possible, doable, and wanted, then do it. Wasting time on being mad is not worth it. Life is too short for it.

And I guess that's all I have to say.

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2 comments:

Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting said...

I am not involved, but I hope it all works out. I just wanted to lend to you my support, and to let you know that you have an ear, if you need one *hugs*

audrey said...

Oh April I'm so sorry. I can "hear" the pain in your writing. I pray that your friends work out whatever is going on. Hugs.

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I'm a walking contradiction. While I love to draw, paint and read, I also love all things gadgets, science and even science fiction (I know). My animals (two dogs and two birds) are my heart, and if I could figure out how to legally own a giraffe, I would. That all said, I have my BS in Mathematics. :o)

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