You have disappointed me more than you know. I know, you’re just dying to know how. Well, have no fear, I’m going to tell you. I understand that you find humor and great joy in remaking classic movies and TV shows. Some of these remakes have turned out cute, I will admit. I will also admit that I’m curious to see how one of your newest remakes “Race to Witch Mountain” has turned out. The original “Witch Mountain” movies were kind of lame, but I know that’s because technology then wasn’t where it is today. But more so than not, these remakes have turned out just completely horrible.

You don’t believe me? What if I were to say, “Bionic Woman”, a show that I was excited about, but sorely disappointed. I don’t want to even talk about it.

No? How about “Dukes of Hazzard“? Jessica Simpson? Really? (Men-not one WORD from you.)

Okay, how about “Lost in Space”? UGH. That’s all I can say on this one.

I could go on and on, but you’re still not convinced? Well let’s try this:

Let’s talk Knight Rider. I should have good memories about this show. I should be able to remember that it was a really cool show that I watched as a kid, and it had a talking car, and it was exciting and fun. But now, all I can think of is that piece of shit show that you have let NBC air. They are calling it Knight Rider, but there is no way that this show can be Knight Rider. The least you could have done was to get a decent actor to try to salvage this garbage. And to make matters worse, you have decided to let the these cars “transform”. Gag me. If I want to watch cars transform, I’ll pop the movie “Transformers” (which was good, by the way, try watching it) into my DVD player. So, please, please, please, do us all a favor and trash this awful excuse for a television show.

And as if it couldn’t get any worse, I was checking a “fact” on IMDB the other day and I see that you are getting ready to remake “Footloose”. Please God NO!!!! Tell me it isn’t so!! And if that’s not bad enough, I see that you have cast Zac Efron as Ren. Trust me people, that kid is no Ren. And oh my dear lord, there are reports that it’s going to be a MUSICAL. I can’t take this anymore. There was nothing wrong with the original. It needs no remake. It had an awesome soundtrack, and it was-no is a great movie. And you’re going to ruin it. I just know it. I beg of you to drop this project now and cast Efron in “High School Musical: 50” or whatever number they’re on now.

Seriously, what have we, the fans, done to offend you this much? Are we so bad that we deserve such crap as entertainment? Are you having writers’ block, maybe? Trying getting advice from the writers of LOST, The Big Bang Theory, Big Love, or Grey’s Anatomy. Those folks have awesome, original shows. Successful shows. That are good. So, please, for the love of God, take note and get your act together (pun intended).